in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
