why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize