being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Randomize
