I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
