Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦ðŸ¼â€â™€ï¸
Randomize
