i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
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