i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
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