If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
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