hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
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