I just saw a hot homeless man
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
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