i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize