You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
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