She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
Randomize
