gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?
Yes and yes
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I am one with the molecules
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
Randomize
