Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize
