don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
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