honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
Your dad touched me again.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
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