How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
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