so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
Randomize
