The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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