Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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