I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
Best friends brother. Beat that.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
