Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
My feet surprised me
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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