Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
Randomize
