Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
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