what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
