Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
Randomize
