just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Randomize
