she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
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