Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
