So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize