He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
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