I CAN MOONWALK!
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
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