Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
they need to just BURY HIM!
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
Randomize