The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Two words: blizzard sex
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Randomize
