and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
Randomize
