thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Randomize
