Woke up this morning to a janitor hitting me in the head with his bucket in the hallway of my building. An alumni was next to me because we locked ourselves out of my room and couldn't figure out where my roommates were.
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
I need to sanitize my soul.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Randomize
