i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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