I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
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