I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Randomize
