her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Randomize
