You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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