Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
Randomize
