Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
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