Ikea night.
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Insert tab A into swedish slot B
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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