You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
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