I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
Randomize
