She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
