The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
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