i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
Randomize
