I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
Heybabeimwearingurpanties
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
You are a genius and a whore.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Randomize
